There are more than just two kinds of love.

In my role as a Marriage & Family Therapist, I often encounter people who exist in duality black and white categories in their lives especially regarding love. While this paradigm truly works for some, it can limit others. How is it possible that you loved a partner so dearly one week only to learn they deceived you and therefore you switch to no love that same day? As if all the love got wiped out in a matter of words? And it seems we all have a sense that the fondness for our favorite pet is different than the love we feel for our romantic partner, which is different than that we feel for our parent. And yet, we call them all love. There are also other experiences in which you regard a friend so dearly they exist in your heart somewhere between brother, lover and best friend, same sex or not and this is a version of love. And can you love more than one person at a time?

The Ancient Greeks had several distinct words for different types of love, including Eros (romantic, passionate love), Philia (deep friendship), Storge (familial love), and Agape (selfless, unconditional love). Other less common terms include Mania (intense, obsessive love), Ludus (playful love), and Pragma (lasting, committed love). 

Here's a more detailed look at each:

• Storge (στοργή):
  Storge encompasses familial love, particularly between parents and children, and can also be used to describe other types of affectionate attachment. 

• Agape (ἀγάπη):
  Agape is often translated as "charitable love" or "love for all," and it's frequently used to describe the love of God for humanity and vice versa. 

• Mania (μανία):
  Mania refers to intense, often obsessive, love, sometimes bordering on madness. 

• Ludus (Λούδος):
  Ludus describes playful love, often found in the early stages of a relationship or between playful friends. 

• Pragma (πράγμα):
  Pragma refers to lasting, committed love that grows over time through shared experiences and care. 

• Philautia (Φιλαυτία):
  Philautia describes self-love, or the love of oneself. 

• Eros (ἔρως):
  This word refers to romantic love, often associated with passion and sexual desire. 
• Philia (φιλία):
  Philia describes deep friendship, affection, and camaraderie. ​

One specialty I truly enjoy which may seem nihilistic, is conscious uncoupling. When it is determined that a romantic partnership is no longer serving either person and is in fact inhibiting the growth of both, a process can be done to mutually and amicably, respectfully and lovingly release each other to a next chapter and a new label of their connection. The love is often not gone, it has merely been transformed into a different nuance of love. This process can also apply to friendships, business partners and even siblings and familial ties. The result is often an increase in Philautia and a heightened sense of Agape.  

My interests and expertise are influenced by my personal experience and journey, which should be implied. I have experienced and been shown in my family, friend circles and communities more iterations of love than I ever thought possible in my youth. I have experienced great heartbreak and soulmate connections. I openly hold space for all of these boundless experiences in my work as a therapist.